A Beautiful Soul

Have you ever had an experience where you attend a meeting with certain ideas of the milieu, the possible hurdles and ultimately what would likely be achieved, only to walk away with so much more than you had bargained for in the best possible way? I have been lucky enough to experience exactly that more than once in my professional and personal life, but there is one stand out meeting that has been running through my head the last couple of days.

The meeting was with a member of the Executive team of a smallish organisation. I came to the meeting in a volunteer capacity to work on the wording of some policies and procedures. Circumstances were changing for the organisation and it was imperative that the P & P reflected those changes, so I was asked to look at the wording with a fresh set of eyes. I had seen the work of this team member and I was incredibly impressed with her attention to detail and extensive knowledge. She fulfilled her role with incredible professionality and expertise. I did not know much about her personally other than we had a few mutual friends.

This organisation was of the caliber that welcomed collaboration and had a mantra of “what can we do better and how can we better understand”, nevertheless, I was expecting to encounter resistance to an outsider trawling through what could be considered sensitive documents. To say my idea was inaccurate would be a poor description of what I actually experienced. I was treated with genuine respect for my opinion and also my time and when I attempted to be gentle and diplomatic, albeit productively critical, the response was please don’t hold any punches I won’t take offence. Perhaps that doesn’t seem amazing, but I have to say I have rarely seen this kind of respect for an outsider especially when dealing with sensitive issues. And yet this seems to be the norm for this organisation and it was clearly the way this team member operated. Each time I remember this experience, I am humbly reminded that assumptions have no place in any of our relationships.

In the process of a brief hello and howdy do, Sonny (not her real name) and I both made comments that were perhaps a little risky for this particular time in the history of the world. Did they just slip out or was there a “safe place” vibe that we both felt? Eager to get to the task at hand we jumped head long into the documents and managed to get through them quicker than expected, giving us time for a good old chin wag. Unexpectedly, we both aired some pretty raw feelings of isolation, hopelessness and betrayal. Those words conjure up visions of a really heavy conversation but in reality we both walked away feeling lighter and more connected. It was so incredibly freeing to speak openly with a kindred spirit. And whilst we didn’t have answers for all of our concerns we could take comfort in the fact there was true understanding and many shared experiences. One epiphany for both of us was that for all the months of feeling alone and isolated, there had been likeminded people sitting equally as silent and alone just next door. And that for me was the moment I realised I needed to “do something” that would connect people and bring those feeling isolated into the community. And I will get to that story another time.

I have titled this piece A Beautiful Soul because I wanted to speak to the beauty that was Sonny. Whilst I cannot tell you her story as it is not mine to tell, I can tell you what I observed and felt that day. She had this incredibly humble, grounded confidence that I would have to say is not something I encounter regularly. In the midst of extreme turmoil, Sonny managed to hold her poise, her grounded confidence in action so to speak. She modeled incredible generosity of spirit and the ability to trust, even though the world and indeed her workplace were pushing people to be afraid of colleagues, friends and family. Her straight up honesty was a breath of fresh air and the absence of judgement was mind blowing. I use the term modeled but really Sonny was the embodiment of a mindset that saw the world and her occupants through a pure lens.

It seems crazy to think we covered so much ground in such a short period of time but our conversation flowed so freely. Thoughts that Sonny shared had my brain ticking about my view of the world, my actions or lack thereof and the way I parent and grandparent. After months of feeling helpless and isolated, a weight had been lifted and the cloud that had shadowed my path was gone. I was inspired to step back into my own strengths because “one drop truly does raise the sea”. I had purpose and knew the actions I needed to take.

As I drove home from the meeting my brain did the usual of slipping straight into overdrive. I took a long, deep breath and in that moment of calm I felt an immense sense of awe for this one person that was Sonny. Her being and our one conversation had transformed my head and heart in the most profound way. I found myself wondering if it was simply the opportunity to connect with a kindred spirit after such a long time of isolation or was it in fact because of a connection with such a beacon of humility and grace. I settled into a heart of gratitude! This was a connection that was so needed and it was made with a human deeply beautiful, deeply grounded and sobrilliantly light.